The energy this week feels to me like greeting the world enthusiastically, starting that project, making dates with friends (or more-than-friends), and painting your bedroom a fun new color. It feels like moving forward — not unlike a bear coming out of hibernation.
After all this movement, later in the week, your old “friend” doubt may creep in. They’re a buzzkill and maybe even sound like someone you grew up with. This voice is an old pattern that you certainly recognize, and it may not look exactly like doubt. It may look like anger bubbling up quickly, or obsessing about something you can’t control. In any case, it’s a limiting pattern that pops up at the exact time you’re following your bliss. Coincidence? I don’t think so.
The energy this week does feel really good, but you may be confronted with a part of yourself that you’re better off not listening to. This is where a little self-examination goes a long way, specifically about what it was like for you growing up when you took action. What was it like when you did the things you loved to do? What was it like when you put yourself out there? What did attention feel like for you growing up?
In my case, when I had done something I was proud of, I was met with anything from annoyance to criticism. This explains the feeling of dread I would get as an adult when working on a project I knew would receive attention.
What about for you? Maybe you had caretakers that were supportive of you, but would be critical of themselves for taking time to do the things they loved. This still gave you the message that putting yourself out there wasn’t entirely the best idea. They modeled that receiving attention was something to contract from.
This isn’t to say you should have a talk with that parent explaining to them all the ways they messed you up — that’s not very helpful. But what is helpful is having a chat now with your inner child, who is still expecting whatever you received growing up. In my inner child healing classfor example, I start with developing the loving inner parent, because that’s exactly the kind of stability we need (especially this week) when we follow our heart’s desires and then hear those limiting beliefs, anger out of nowhere, or whatever it is that comes up for you.